Ok. I gotta sort my shit and stick with this. Don’t worry, I’m 22 now. I’m older and wiser. I have a desk. New desk, new me. First off, shout out to Matty Moo for sorting out my new header thingy so the site looks all sexy and seductive.

More importantly, write some music stuff. Ok, now this one is fucking kick ass. It’s a cover version that takes us on a magical journey and means I get to show off three super gnarly tracks all in one. Awh boyeeeeeee.

So, “Pony” by Ginuwine, is the original. Weird video, weird lyrics, weird and convoluted euphemism about horses. Fantastic song though. Forget the verse for the most part. It’s one of those songs where you mostly want to listen to the chorus over and over again. Let’s be honest, you’re unlikely to go around singing “I’m just a bachelor…” but you will be slow grinding by yourself in work/in the car/ in mass/ on public transport while singing “If you’re horny, Let’s do it, ride it, my pony…”

Theeeen, a few weeks ago, Zak Waters, my mutha fucking hero, released a cover of the track because he’d been covering it on tour. It remains faithful to the original but with a Zak Waters twist. The vocals are better. He goes all X Tina (Christina Aguilera for the lay folk who aren’t cool in 2004 like me). It’s chill and sexy and cool.

But guess what, little homies! Zak Waters send me on an old vision quest back to one of the most badass remixes in the history of the universe, Rihanna “Jump (Club Cheval Remix feat Theolonius London)”. SO fucking ominous . Some creepy Trap is just what the doctor order. Although trap sounds like it’s a word for vagina… it’s gotta be. That’s not a comment on Rihanna’s vagina though. She’s probably a cool lady with a perfectly fine collection of genitals. If you’re my family pretend you never read this.

Alas, I digress. There we have three groovy tracks all around one idea. I think they’ve all got their merits. The original gets fuckoffmadstyle bonus points for being the original and the Rihanna tracks gives you exactly what you wanted from the song. However, all round I think the Zak Waters take is the best. He’s got a kickass soulful voice and it’s just an awesome cover.

Hit me up with cool covers of shit either in the comments or on the twitter phone. Yezzur